Hello again, all you lovely Bunchers! My goodness, what an up and down time it has been since I last wrote to you.
We had a positively brilliant Christmas, but then came the shock of the post-Christmas banana famine (we’ve been rationed to just one banana per monkey, per day for weeks now – just awful!). I can, so clearly, remember the look of disbelief on the faces of all the family when Montgomery and I returned from the greengrocer’s shop with empty bags. Montgomery’s stomach started to rumble at that moment, and it has not stopped since! I have to use earplugs to get some sleep!
Next the dreadful weather started. Living in Treetop Cottage means that we are very lucky, and our paws are dry; but my goodness we are so sad and worried for all our friends whose homes are full of water. Just as soon as we have some spare bananas we will be out and about, delivering to our friends to try to cheer them up a bit.
And on top of this we’ve just heard the news that our American cousin Monroe broke a paw while trying to deliver emergency bananas to his local hospital. One quick trip, slip and slide and he was head-first down a large rabbit hole! His darling Marietta has been at his hospital bedside for days. Poor Marietta! Apparently Monroe (who is extremely fond of his food) has been very unhappy about not being allowed to eat before and after his anaesthesia!
All of which is making me very worried indeed as it has just been decided that Monroe (who is still confined to bed) will be coming to Treetop Cottage for several weeks, to convalesce, while Marietta goes to Europe to urgently buy some emergency bananas for us all.
Oh Dear, Oh Dear. It is very brave and generous of Marietta to go off on a banana hunt, but I do so wish it was me who was going instead! Treetop Cottage is already full, and now I have to work out how to feed a guest who is going to be very unhappy that there are so few bananas to go round.
But never fear. I, Marigold Montague, am a very resourceful monkey. If professional chefs can be given awards for food which is made of one thing, but looks and tastes like another, we monkeys can do it too!
Right now I’m experimenting with a mixture of mashed parsnip, curry powder, brown sugar and yellow food colouring. Phase one of the experiment is working brilliantly and the result looks remarkably like a real banana. It is just tedious that the family are so impolite about the flavour….But never mind, A Monkey Never Gives Up, and I WILL create the perfect artificial banana, even if it takes all year!
On a much happier note, we had the most marvellous Christmas? The banana famine hadn’t yet started and we enjoyed a positively sumptuous Christmas Day dinner of baked bananas with chocolate-spinach dumplings, banana-celery fritters, and a huge banana and pickled onion casserole, followed by large dollops of banana-caramel trifle – all washed down with Granny’s best banana lemonade. Bliss!!
And what fun we had when, just after Christmas dinner, Santa Monkey arrived with wonderful presents for all the family.
In fact we were all so mellow and relaxed that we didn’t even mind Baby Maisie climbing the Christmas tree. Though it was rather a shame that she landed on top of the remaining trifle when the tree fell over. Such a waste of a good trifle!
Ah well, that’s all for now, my lovely Buncher friends. Monroe is due to arrive this evening, and we are determined to make him feel totally welcome. At the same time, if any of you see Marietta while you are travelling in Europe, please encourage her to come back very soon!
Biggest hugs from your friend, Marigold Montague monkey XXX
